• 29Oct 05

  Life Lived Right

  for Christmas, one of my true wishes is coming true.. I'm going to be able to drive through McAdenville, which is a huge night drive through woods, streets, churches, all layden with Christmas lights.. And beautiful Choirs playing at the Churches, bells ringing (are ya listening ) The day a Christmas is bad for me, or when I can't dream about it anymore, I no longer have a strong component fueling me..
  I've been thinking back on something I did a little while ago.. I went Christmas shopping with my mom and got me a new tv, and some other stuff for my sisters, blah blah, anyway, we needed a place to take the stuff to, and it turned out to be a GreatGrandmother figure, grandmother figure of my mother's, new house.. So we go there, I load the 27" in her garage It's not 52" and she asks us to take a look at her new house with her.. We didn't have the time as so my mom said, but I really wanted to see it, and was near the door where she was. So she agreed to look at it with her, and at that I had my shoes off to not track anything in her house.. We went in, and started looking around, washing and drying machines first on the list and then the upstairs, beautiful bathrooms, top of the line stuff.. She's a very pretty woman from my perspective, to be a grandmother figure for my mother it certainly isn't showing, and she has these cobalt blue and brown mixed eyes.. Really cool.. And the kitchen blew me by storm, but the refrigerator hurt me cause I put my hand in the refrigerator door like handle, and continued holding it as it shut, and there was no finger space so my fingers got crunched in with the other door handle.. >.< Everything was beautiful in the home, kitchen lead out to the entertainment porch caged with bug-proof screens where I had envisioned having a bbq later in the summer.. All through this the bedrooms, everything, the woman called off everything, the man who built this, the man who installed that, what this is, what that is, where she got that, how cheap, what a deal.. The list goes on endlessly.. She was very proud of her new home.. It was only until I got into her living room I was truly hit with amazement.. Nothing at all out of the ordinary: A nice tv, 40 something inch, nice fireplace, couch.. Nothing out of the ordinary, except, this chair.. It was a polished dark brown color.. And it just grabbed me, and entangled some of my emotions I can't explain it.. It had golden button linings from the bottom up to the armrests and back down, and was standing on 4 majestically carved wooden legs.. A true, old manor, lounging chair.. I could seee this chair, going in a huge Manor, somewhere where I'd enjoy it.. Really can't explain my fascination for that damn chair.. Anywhoo, we go into her bedroom, and I catch a glimpse of her younger pictures, and wedding pictures, and that kinda swept me off somewhere else where I couldn't hear my mother's bickering.. I could tell, in the picture how happy they were, and all those years later, she was still as infatuated with her husband as the day they met.. That really got me thinking, not in a good way, but in a sad way, if there'll ever be that woman to cast that effect upon me.. And if so, this would be the kind of life I'd want to lead.. A beautiful home..........That house....Made me want to skip to my senior citizen days.. I really give her an amount of respect now, that of the billions of people that live the ways and roads of misfortune, she is one of the few, good people, who is happy both in love and in life.. I think I creeped her out though, cause I'm not a badass biker dude, I have very supersensitive emotions, and when I walked to her mantel, and supidly stuck my nose in her business by reading a birthday card "To my dear wife" I can't recall the poem as of now, but several of the words "heart" "love" "always" were underlined in a serious handwriting, next thing I knew, I saw a red nose and shiny eyes in my reflection in her almost mirrorized house.. So when time came to leave, it was evident I was upset, and I myself still don't exactly know why my feelings poured out the way they did.. Maybe because the hardships I had been through, and to see someone who had done things her way, and through my eyes exactly perfect.. And to top the icing on the cake she said where she was putting her tree, beside the dining room table at the foreviewing of three windows, a main, and two arched at it's sides, to be seen from the road.. One of the big white Christmas trees comes to mind when I think about what tree she may have.. That or a masterfully decorated green tree.. Artificial or real, to get a mild pine scent through the house.. Ornaments and decorations that aren't rich or pricy.. Ornaments that have been through the family, made by children, decorated by children.. What is that to say that for a season, a holiday, a truly special one to my mind, be decorated and painted by your children.. I'm starting to see now why mothers and fathers are so insistent on photographs and filming occasions..
  Anyway time came to leave, and I kept imaging coming back over at every time she mentioned entertaining, and bringing people over for Christmas Dinner..
  • Posted Oct 29, 2005 2:43 am PT
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• 23Sep 05

  Ecco update

  Well,

  Things are going wonderfully.. I couldn't be happier with how things are going both in my replay experience of this game, my continuing respect for it, and how my plans for the union are looking.

  I have already checked the boards, and am getting ready for the big transition into my first union, and for the bigger step into getting a beautiful name out and it's importance.. I do not want to sound advertising, but it's going to be beautiful.. With no previous unions on the roster, I'm really excited about this, and again, notification, the Ecco union, is underway.. My first plans of business are to talk to my good buddy Glaz, he always makes the greatest of tags, and I'm going to see if he can take on my banner for me...
  I still have a wide array for what I plan on doing to and for the union, but I'm not going to reveal anything because we need to keep some secrecy in it..

  This is my dream come true here.. That and I have the best person possible for a co-founder/leader.. Another set of business, one of the first places here on GS I ever posted in was an Ecco petition, signed something, anyhow, I'm going to contact the members of that thread, for registration with the ecco union.. All eventually of course..

  Banner, tags and such, and a couple other little odds and ends.. The union may have to be pushed back a while, because I'm very busy on the weekends, but it can be expected sometime next week..

  My walkthrough, is still in the making.. I am going to need to work really hard and go to every aspect of the game if I am going to beat Brian Taylor's review.. As for my review on GS, I'm still reading over those submitted, Kal's, and the other two, and I'll get on to that soon.. I've been prepping for this moment since I joined, so I'm going to make it a good review..

  I'll edit this update as I information comes to me, and when I get the first banner..

  • Posted Sep 23, 2005 3:34 pm PT
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• 14Sep 05

  I just had the coolest F-ing dream ever

  Well here's how it started out..

  I was in a sedan, packed with bullets.. Amongst me were three other companions filling the car, and we were all armed, locked down in a shot-car holding off police officers from every point on our clock.. I was in the back seat, left side, wrapping up on the ammunition in my pistol which didn't last long in my dream, shot up some front bumpers and capped a couple windshields and the gun was in the floorboard amongst tons of others.. I recall none of us in the car having foot-room due to massive weaponry..
  I move on to a pump-action, sawed-off spas shotgun, and start firing at the police, person beside me firing with a handgun, and the two up front firing with assault rifles.. I think those two were the most skilled, because I was watching the halfway point of my door, and back.. And those two up front watched the halfway point of their doors and the entire windshield space..
  So anyway, it's night-time, and my shotgun's dry, and I toss it out, and grab an m60e4, 101 rounds in the the beast.. I fired so many accurate bursts, and think in this dream that rifle was the sole reason I stayed alive.. Aiming through the weak crosshair and looking outside at the gravel road we were on the side of, beside of a toolshed, which had a street light on, giving a misty, dark affect and lighting to the gravel and grass and the cars.. It smelled like the cold night outside..
  Pretty soon we're done, all the cops are dead, and we all get out of the car, and watch each other's back until we get to another car..

  The dream jumps.. I'm driving, the person beside me in the shootout is in the passenger, and the two in the front last time back in the back.. Our footspace is crammed with weapons again, and I can barely drive.. The guys are all talking about some random stuff, and for the first time in this whole thing I'm scared.. We drive down an old country road and up to a stop sign beside a gas station.. I make a right turn, and know where I'm going.. It's all been prescheduled.. We were walking right into a setup we knew about.. The police had a baracade setup, and for some reason, we were going to it, we knew about it.. I ask the person in the back right about the weaponry.. I request an M249, a 200rd. machinegun with a scope, and he says no, I'll have to make due with what we got.. A crap rifle, brown and copperish from age and rust.. Pistols are better, clipfed and two of them this time, and another shotgun, a short one.. The guy beside me has the same stuff, crap weapons, and the back two have their original machineguns from the first shootout..
  No way I thought, a lot less ammunition this time, firepower, and more cops.. I was scared, and I was scared for myself at my observation perspective in the dream, I wanted to wake up and it be over, so I couldn't see what happens.. The dream continues..
  Going straight down that road I made a right down, I look to the passenger who resembles Steve Zahn, and I'm so scared.. I say, "I don't wanna die" and he knows just what to say.. He says, "You don't know what world you're gonna go to when you die" and for some reason that assured me.. Got me thinking about going down this way, in another shootout.. Thinking about what's to come for us all, It was only enough to keep me driving there and still doing it, I was still scared..
  I felt like a kid who wasn't gonna get to live the life his mom wanted for him, cause he did something his mom told him not to do.. It's daytime now, I shoulda said that early on..
  I take a left down a gravel road, and see police officers.. The guys are still laughing and kinda joking about the whole situation, I'm still scared.. I drive into the baracade, and feel that feeling of being "surrounded" and drive the car where they tell me, to 4 tire marks, each tire to each marker, these markers are more loaded weapons, a marker for each of us.. The two in the back instantly get out onto the plain resembling the same one the first shootout was at, and walk over to two large, red crasftsman toolchests on wheels.. They wheel them over and kick one on each side of the car.. And this is something I'm particularly proud of, because my mind was able to generate something so cool and original for my enjoyment such as big red toolboxes for cover..
  Anyway, I get out, and start walking over the these two police, one has a cowboy hat on.. The two in the backseat ask me where I'm going and I say I'll be right back.. I keep walking, my little shotgun in my left hand, I approach the one wearing a cowboy hat.. I look at him for a moment, lips tucked in fear, and eyes almost in tears.. I extend my hand to him, and he looks at me for a long time in understanding, and shakes my hand.. I say "I wish things were different" then I turn to shake his partner's hand.. He acts alarmed about it and doesn't understand but shakes my hand a lot sooner..
  I walk back to the car, and get in the driver's seat.. Close the door.. Shotgun down, and rifle in hand.. We were all getting ready... My heart was racing in this confined area.. Police all around us, and our odds lessened from last time..
  
  We all move to fire and the dream ended.. I think my mind chose to wake me up because I did not want to know the outcome.. I think I died at least, or we all died.. Because not only was I firing at a larger squad, with weaker weapons and smaller magazines, I was in the position to cover a larger perimeter around the car.. And I remember I was not as good as the two in the back.. But it was cool, I loved it while it lasted..

  • Posted Sep 14, 2005 5:13 am PT
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