Euphoria

The dictionary states that Euphoria is a feeling of confidence, well-being, and happiness. It continues by saying that it is often exagerated as a state of mania.

Well, tonight has confirmed what my Euphoria is.

Food.

Maybe it is the alcohol speaking, but to me, food is the foundation of life. Fundamentally, we need it to survive. Protein, carbohydrate, fat...all necessary to human beings in order to survive. Yet on the idealistic level, food achieves a far greater stature. It can lead to people feeling happy, it can be the centerpiece of a poltical deal, and it can be the essence of religion ranging from loaves to fishes.

To me, on this night, Euphoria is Coq au Vin.

To the gourmand, Coq au Vin is a staple of French cuisine. To the unitiated, it is braised chicken stewed in wine and vegetables.

To me, Coq au Vin is a reflection of my personality. If you ask my Mom, I have been cooking since I was a toddler. I learned to add, subtract, multiply, and divide not in the classroom, but instead in my family's kitcehn using teaspons, tablespoons, quarter cups, and quarts. But I digress...

Tonight I made my own version of Coq au Vin. I chopped leeks, onion, bell pepper, garlic, celery, and onion. After seasoning some chicken things and searing them in a saute pan, I then trasnfered the perfumed oil to a large pot and sauted my aromatic and vegetables. When they became soft, I added half a bottle of red wine and some rehyrdrated porcini mushrooms, brought to a simmer, and then added my chicken thighs. An hour later after a low simmer, I dished it up on some brown rice, the gamiest of grains in my opinion, and consumed along with a bottle of white wine.

A simple, low-intensity dish prepared by perhaps the world's most laid-back (but not lazy!) man. Not only does this dish appeal to my palette, but it appeals to my personality. Rustic cuisine, pure and simple.

It was heaven. Perhaps it is the fact that I havent actually created something in my kitchen for over three weeks, or perhaps it was the wine in my system, but I achieved a state of peace I havent felt for a very, very long time. I apolgize if I come off as an idealist or a romantic, or if I am doing what the call wax poetic (is that the term), but for some reason my soul resonates not just with the consumption of food, but with its creation. Looking back on all the years of my life, I find that the happiest moments were when I created food for people. Whether it was in the Italian restaurant I worked at during college, or whether it was cooking Christmas dinner for all my local family, I relish the opportunity to create food for people.

Well, its been an interesting month. Like I mentioned I got a new job and moved mid-June. Those first few days were hectic as I had spent all my money on a deposit, rent, bed, and other stuff so I did not have enough money to stock my fridge. So I had to eat some fast food. I forgot how good it tastes, but since I've essentially been grease-free for over half a year it wreaked havoc on my system...I woke up feeling sick as a dog.

Fortunately I got paid and I can now buy good stuff. So I have been eating fairly healthy (oatmeal for breakfast, protein shake for snack, mixed greens with a can of tuna on top for lunch, and something lean for dinner) but now there is another issue: my workout schedule!

Work is essentially a "make your own hours" situation. Unfortunately, my hours are based on the head brewer since I am in an apprenticeship position. I have to show up when the other guys shows up. Since my days are usually 10 hours of lifting 50 pound sacks and 100 pound kegs, stirring quicksand-like mash, and doing other physical stuff in a hot and steamy room, I cant workout after work. As a result, I have to workout in the morning. Unfortunately, it seems like the guy I work with always calls me five mins after I get on the elliptical machine! GRRrrrrr!

Anyway, to sum up, I dont feel I have put on too much weight...I am more concerned about losing my muscle mass (which turns to fat, yuck) as a result of not lifting weights. I think my job has me burning enough calories throughout the day that I can stay at my current weight if I continue to eat healthy.

OK, thats it for now...more of an angry rant than a blog. I need to find a scale that can go beyond 300 pounds so I can track my progress...its very difficult to hold yourself accountable when you can tell yourself that you think youre losing weight (as opposed to knowing youre losing weight).

OK, so in the past four hours there have been about five threads built upon anti-atheism of varying degrees.

SO I go to make a pro-atheism thread asking that atheists be left alone by our religious harassers. It gets locked in 10 minutes, the reply being "we dont need another thread"

I agree, another thread was not needed...about FOUR THREADS AGO!

So my question is this...was that fair? Was it fair to allow four or more anti-atheism threads, and zero pro-atheism threads?

It is clear that Gamespot mods have an agenda, and frankly this is the first time moderation has been offensive to me. I have had threads locked before, and I have been suspended, but this is the first time I think Gamespot made a mistake. In short, I feel every Gamespotian deserves equal representation.

PS: for anyone that did see my thread, I wrote "please, for the love of God, leave us atheists ALONE!" as a bit of sarcasm to lighten the mood. I realize sarcasm doesnt translate well through text, but for Christ's sake people wasn't it obvious I was joking? Or were you people that replied so quick to prove me wrong that you typed something before you actually thought about what I mean by it?

My goal for this blog is more to hold myself accountable by making a public record of my progress, while possibly helping those that would also like some tips on weight loss.

OK, so I will just start from the top, give some quick background. When I went to college, I weighed 275. That seems like a lot (and it is lol) but I was not a fatass; I am a tall guy (6'3''), I do have large bone structure, and I have a lot of muscle. I was husky, but I had no gut or anything. Come junior and senior year of college, I had a lot of stress in my life. Combined with me turning 21 years old and drinking heavily, I essentially balooned to 417 pounds by September 2007. My social life went to crap because most of the friends I was comfortable with had graduated and left, and I was too ashamed to pursue any new friendships with whatever acquiantences I had. This only made the problem worse. Oh ya, and I forgot to mention that I was a cook and I am a gourmand, which means I love good food lol.

So, anyway, something had to be done. So when November came around and I was done with school, I moved back home and started to lose weight. The first trick is to get a gym membership. For the first three years of college I was addicted to the gym, and I was able to maintain my weight and strength. But when I moved off campus, it became harder to motivate myself. So, as I worked out, I could feel myself losing weight. It was great.

The second key to me losing weight is my job, which was an active one, so it supplements going to the gym quite well. I was a cook at this startup company, and essentially I was working 70 hours a week. I would stand on my feet for 12 hours a day, six days a week, and eat only one meal with the occasional snack every now and then. It was great; I problably walked about one mile every day going back and forth to the walk-in cooler. I quit that job, but now I work in a brewery, but thankfully that is also an active job and I have been able to keep my beer consumption to a minimum (about 3 beers a week).

Diets are epic failures in my eyes. South Beach, Atkins...theyre not worth it. I have been on all of them, and while I lost a good amount of weight at times, they simply are not something I could live with, nor should they be. With that said, I went about coming up with my own diet (I have a degree in food science, and took a lot of nutrition classes). Essentially, I can eat whatever I want, so long as the glycemic index of the food is low and my fat intake is under 20 grams of fat per day, and I limit my starchy carbs. So I can eat any fruit with edible skins (apples, grapes, plums, cherries, etc) but none with no skins (I cant eat bananas, for example). I can also eat all kinds of vegetables, but not heavy starches like potatoes. HF Corn Syrup is a huge no-no, and should be illegal imo.

By doing that, I have lost 52 pounds since since December. I was 417, and I am now 365. I will continue to make monthly installments on my blogs to keep track of my progress.

Well, after two suspensions in a row (a three-day and a seven-day) I am back.

And, of course, when you are suspended suddenly there is a plethora of interesting, unqiue posts to respond to.

In short, I will be watching my mouth and what pictures I post. I am just happy i did not get banned!

So today was my second day at work in a small microbrewery and it...is...AWESOME! Its a lot of hard work and cleaning, but it is so enjoyable. The pay sucks, but it is good experience for me (I majored in Food Science at college) so it should look good on a resume.

With that said, I can honestly see myself doing this forever, albeit in my own brewery or at a place that can pay me 60+k a year. I got to make five barrels of stout yesterday, and today I learned how to clean kegs, clean bottles, fill bottles, and all kinds of things. The people I work with are super cool as well.